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A baby shower is a way to celebrate the expected or delivered birth of a child by presenting gifts to the mother at a party, whereas other cultures host a baby shower to celebrate the transformation of a woman into a mother. The event has different names in different cultures.


Video Baby shower



Etymology

The term shower is often assumed to mean that the expectant mother is "showered" with gifts. A related custom, called a bridal shower, may have derived its name from the custom in the 19th century for the presents to be put inside a parasol, which when opened would "shower" the bride-to-be with gifts. Alternatively the term possibly denotes a "first showing" of the new baby to the wider family and circle of friends.


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Description

Traditionally, baby showers are given only for the family's first child, and only women are invited, though this has changed in recent years, now allowing showers being split up for different audiences: workplace, mixed-sex, and feminist. Activities at baby showers include gift-giving and playing themed games.

Baby shower games vary, sometimes including standard games such as bingo, and sometimes being pregnancy-themed, such as "guess the mother's measurements" or "guess the baby". These games help let the close friends attending the shower bond with the mother, and enable the new family to say thanks ahead of time, figuring out who is willing and able to help them with the challenges of bringing up a child.

According to etiquette authority Miss Manners, because the party centers on gift-giving, the baby shower is typically arranged and hosted by a close friend rather than a member of the family, since it is considered rude for families to beg for gifts on behalf of their members. However, this custom varies by culture or region and in some it is expected and customary for a close female family member to host the baby shower, often the baby's grandmother.

When a baby shower is held after the birth of a baby, an invitation to attend the shower may be combined with a baby announcement. In the US, if a baby shower doesn't happen before the arrival of the baby, a sip-and-see party or other similar event can be organized after the birth.


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Gifts

Guests bring small gifts for the expectant mother. Mothers are usually given pampering treats. Typical gifts related to babies include diapers, blankets, baby bottles, clothes, and toys. It is common to open the gifts during the party; sometimes the host will make a game of opening gifts.


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Family bonding

The baby shower is a family's first opportunity to gather people together to help play a part in their child's life. The new parents may wish to call on people to assist in the upbringing of their child, and help educate the child over time. People around the family, who care for them, want to be involved in the child's life, and a baby shower presents an opportunity for them to give gifts and be of help, showing their love for the family. If it happens before the birth, it allows the new family to thank everyone before the stress of a new baby and lack of sleep begins.


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History

The term "baby shower" is relatively new, but the celebrations and rituals associated with pregnancy and childbirth are both ancient and enduring.

  • Ancient India: In India, a pregnancy ritual has been followed since the vedic ages: an event called seemantha, held in the 6th or 8th month. The mother-to-be is showered with dry fruits, sweets and other gifts that help the baby's growth. A musical event to please the baby's ears is the highlight of the ritual, as it was common knowledge that the baby's ears would start functioning within the womb. The ritual prays for a healthy baby and mother, as well as a happy delivery and motherhood.
  • Ancient Egypt: In ancient Egypt, rituals relating to the birth of a child took place after the event itself. Quite unlike modern baby showers, this involved the mother and the child being separated to "contain and eliminate the pollution of birth" - this may have included visiting local temples or shrines. After this, there may also have been household rituals that took place, but the specifics have been found hard to study as these are such female-centered events.
  • Ancient Greece: The ancient Greeks also celebrated pregnancy after the birth, with a shout (oloyge) after the labor has ended, to indicate that "peace had arrived". Five to seven days later, there is a ceremony called Amphidromima, designed to indicate that the baby had integrated into the household, and after ten days, the ritual Dekate indicates the mother will return to her place in society (mirrored in modern-day Iran).
  • Middle Ages: Due to the likelihood a mother would die in childbirth, this time was recognized as having a great risk of spiritual danger in addition to the risk of physical danger. Priests would often visit women during labor so they could confess their sins. After the birth, usually on the same day, a baptism ceremony would take place for the baby. In this ceremony, the godparents would give gifts to the child, including a pair of silver spoons.
  • Renaissance: Pregnancies at this time were celebrated with many different kids of birth gifts: functional items, like wooden trays and bowls, as well as paintings, sculptures, and food. Childbirth was seen as almost mystical, and mothers-to-be were often surrounded with references to the Annunciation by way of encouragement and celebration.
  • Victorian era: Victorian women would keep their pregnancies secret, upholding cultural standards of proper behavior, but after the baby was born, other women would often hold tea parties for the new mother. Superstitions sometimes led to speculation that a woman might be pregnant, such as two teaspoons being accidentally placed together on a saucer. Gifts were usually hand-made, but the grandmother would give silver.
  • Modern era: With the consumer ideology of the 1950s and 1960s, the modern baby shower started during the baby boom era and served the function of providing the mother and her home with material goods. This started the tradition of "showering" the mother with gifts, and brought about a more relaxed atmosphere with regards to the pregnancy.
  • Twenty-first century: While continuing the traditions from the 1950s, modern technology has changed the form a baby shower takes: games can include identifying baby parts on an ultrasound, and while traditional baby showers were female-exclusive, mixed-sex showers have increased in prevalence.

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In different countries

Baby showers and other social events to celebrate the impending or recent birth are popular around the world. They are women-only social gatherings.

  • In Australia, Canada, New Zealand and the United States, baby shower is a common tradition.
  • In the United Kingdom, baby showers are not historically customary, but are becoming more common.
  • In Bangladesh, in many places a party named "sadh" (???) or "sadhbhokkhon" (????????) is observed on the 7th month of pregnancy. After this the woman resides in the house of her father instead of the house of her husband till baby birth.
  • In Brazil, a party called "chá de bebê" (baby tea) is offered before birth and is often a women-only event.
  • In Bulgaria, as a superstition, no baby gifts are given to the family prior to the birth of the baby. The newborn baby, however would be given or sent unsolicited gifts by family and friends, even if some babies are kept away from public for the first 40 days after birth to prevent early infections.
  • In Chinese tradition, a baby shower, called manyue (??) is held one month after the baby is born.
  • In Hmong culture, a baby shower is called "Puv Hli," and is held one month after the baby is born. A ceremony would be hosted by the paternal grandparents or the father to welcome the baby to the family by tying the baby's wrist with white yarn and/or strings.
  • In Armenia, a baby shower is called "qarasunq" (?????????) and is celebrated 40 days after baby's birth. It is a mixed party for all relatives and friends. Guests usually bring gifts for the baby or parents.
  • In Iran, a baby shower (Persian:???? ??????) is also called a "sismooni party" (Persian:??? ???????). It is celebrated 1-3 months before the baby's birth. Family and close friends give gifts intended for the baby such as a cot, toys and baby clothes.
  • In Costa Rica, a baby shower party is called té de canastilla ("basket tea").
  • In Nepal, a baby shower party is called "dahi-chiura" (??? ?????) and is celebrated on the 6-7th month of pregnancy.
  • In Mongolia, a baby shower is called "???????? ???????" (huuhdyn ugaalga).
  • In Hindu tradition, they are called by different names depending on the community the family belongs to.
    • In northern India it is known as godbharaai, in western India, especially Maharashtra, the celebration is known as dohaaljewan, and in West Bengal and Odisha it is called saadhroshi.
    • In Southern India, in Tamil Nadu/Andhra Pradesh it is called Seemantham or Valaikaapu or Poochoottal (The expecting mother wears bangles and adorned with flowers) and in Karnataka it is called Seemanta(?????) and is held when the woman is in her 5th or 7th or 9th month of pregnancy. Although Seemantham, Valaikappu and Poochoottal might be celebrated together, they are very different. Seemantham is a religious ceremony while Valaikappu and Poochoottal is a purely social event much like Western baby showers. In a Valaikappu and Poochoottal, there is music played, and the expecting mother is decked in traditional attire with lots of flowers and garlands made of jasmine or mogra. A swing is decorated with flowers of her choice, which she uses to sit and swing. At times there are symbolic cut-outs of moons and stars that are put up. There are blessings showered on her by the elderly ladies from the household and community. Gifts are given to the expecting mother.
    • In Gujarat, it is known as " Seemant" or "Kholo Bharyo ". It's religious rituals in most of Gujarati Hindus during 5th or 7th Month of pregnancy. A pregnant woman can only go to her father's home for delivery after her " Seemant". Usually it's only for the first child. They offer special prayer and food to the goddess "Randal, the wife of the Sun".
    • In Kerala, it is known as 'Pulikudi' or 'Vayattu Pongala', and is practiced predominantly in the Nair community, though its popularity has spread to other Hindu sects as well over the years. On an auspicious day, after being massaged with homemade ayurvedic oil, the woman has a customary bath with the help of the elderly women in the family. After this, the family deity is worshipped, invoking all the paradevatas (family deities) and a concoction of herbal medicines prepared in the traditional way, is given to the woman. The woman is dressed in new clothes and jewellery used for such occasions. A big difference in the western concept of baby shower and Hindu tradition is that the Hindu ceremony is a religious ceremony to pray for the well-being of the baby. In most conservative families gifts are bought for the mother-to-be but not the baby. The baby is showered with gifts only after birth.
  • In the Islamic tradition of Aqiqah, an animal is slaughtered on 7th day after the child's birth (such as a sheep) and the meat is distributed among poor and relatives. The practice is considered sunnah and is not done universally.
  • In South Africa, a baby shower is called a stork party (named after the folk myth that a white stork delivers babies), and takes place typically when the mother is about 6 months pregnant. Stork parties are usually not attended by men. The stork party is accompanied by silliness such as dressing up, and gifts of baby supplies are given to the mother. A stork party is often organised as a surprise without the mother's knowledge.
  • In Nepal a baby shower is known as "dahi chiura khuwaune". The mother-to-be is given gifts from her elders and a meal is cooked for her according to her preferences. The pregnant mother is often invited by her relatives to eat meals with them. Pasni is a traditional celebration after the birth of the child, often marking the age of 6th months for a boy child and 5 months for a girl, often marking the transition to a diet higher in carbohydrates, and allowing the people attending to give their blessings, money and other gifts.
  • In Guatemala, only women attend this event. Middle class women usually celebrate more than one baby shower (one with close friends, co-workers, family, etc.).
  • In Russia, and Commonwealth of Independent States, there are no baby showers, though some of the younger generation are starting to adapt it.

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Baby showers for fathers

Some baby showers are directed at the future father. These may be more oriented towards drinking beer, watching sports, fishing, or playing video games. The primary nature of these gifts is diapers and/or diaper-related items. The organization of the diaper party is typically done by the friends of the father-to-be as a way of helping to prepare for the coming child. These parties may be held at local pubs/bars, a friend's house, or the soon-to-be grandfather's house. In the United Kingdom, this is called wetting the baby's head, and is seen more commonly than baby showers. Wetting the baby's head is traditionally when the father celebrates the birth by having a few drinks with a group of friends.

There has been some controversy over these, with Judith Martin calling them a "monstrous imposition", although she was referring to the attitude of demanding gifts and not necessarily the male version of a baby shower.


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Names for events

  • Diaper shower refers to a small-scale baby shower, generally for subsequent children, when the parents don't need as many baby supplies.
  • Grandma's shower refers to a shower at which people bring items for the grandparents to keep at their house, such as a collapsible crib and a changing pad.
  • Sprinkles are small showers for a subsequent child, especially a child who is of a different gender than the previous offspring.

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References

Source of the article : Wikipedia

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